It happens to all of us at some point or another.
It feels like the wheels are coming off your train, and you don’t know how to set your life back on course to normal.
I know. I’ve been there. And it stinks.
But… it will be what you make it. Life coach Mary Morrissey asserts that all circumstances are neutral. It is your thoughts that give circumstances meaning. Your thoughts and beliefs attract circumstances into your life.
When crisis strikes, of course you are going to feel angry, disappointed, hurt, or betrayed. Let yourself feel these feelings without judgment. Then choose another state of mind.
It takes work to release hurt and sorrow. It takes work to come to terms with betrayal, but it doesn’t control you.
You can choose to release the hurt, fear, anger, and depression.
You intervene in the autopilot panic thoughts and flow positive thoughts in their place. You press pause on the panic, consciously and deliberately.
Let me give you a few examples.
My husband and I got into a fender-bender, and we were driving his parents’ pickup, not our own car. The pickup sustained no damage at all, but the Camaro we hit had a sizable dent. My husband immediately worried that he would be blamed for the accident, even though we had the right of way. He was concerned that his parents’ insurance rates would go up, that we would have to come up with the money for their deductible, etc.
These are all natural and understandable fears, but I stopped him. “Nothing bad will come from this,” I told him. “It wasn’t your fault. Nothing bad will happen.”
Every time a thought or worry came up, I flowed peace and repeated, “Nothing bad will happen. It will be okay.”
A couple of weeks later the whole thing was resolved effortlessly. No raised premiums, no ticket, no problems. It was not a coincidence, but the direct result of practicing the principle of tackling any problem with a no-panic mindset.
The next catastrophe that hit dealt with one of my kids. It sunk me into an emotional slump. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I couldn’t stop crying. I let myself fully feel all of my pain, then I decided, “Something good will come of this.” I meditated. I prayed. I went for walks. I sought peace every day. Over the next few weeks my eyes were opened to many positive things that resulted from the situation. I felt my energy change from anger and frustration to calm and compassionate. I still cried, but they were tears of love and understanding, not hurt and betrayal.
I received beautiful new insight and revelation. Most of all, I was able to see that this catastrophe wasn’t mine to own. I released my attachment to it because I understand that my kids, like all of us, have to make their own way in the world. I cannot and will not own their mistakes. In a Master Plan that champions free will above safety, I would do them a great disservice if I tried to take their agency from them.
I am more relaxed as a mother and mentor because this situation showed me that I had to let go and trust that my child would be supported by the same Infinite Power that has helped and sustained me all my life.
I would not have experienced this growth without this situation. I would never have moved to this level of understanding and peace if I had chosen to stay in anger, hurt, and betrayal.
Even when you physically hurt from emotional pain, you can choose peace. It doesn’t come from ignoring or denying your pain. It comes from the understanding that all circumstances are indeed neutral, and even this can be a blessing if you let it. If you seek peace, if you seek gratitude (not for the pain, but in it), you will be amazed how circumstances shift, how you evolve, and how many good things can flow your way.